Olevel Chinese Results..

Today was the release Of the olevel chinese... B3 merit... Seriously, M?? Is that all that im capable of?? My oral sux so much?? Even christopher got distinction... I really cnt find any excuse to even cover up this crap. Merit?? I really wonder what ive been doin all this time... Waste of time... What to do..? Merit, B3. A1 is so far away... How do i grab hold of it now... I cant... I really doubt taking 1 more time will help at all... And i dun even noe why i am gonna take it again... Is this whats gonna happen to all my other subjects??? It hurts soo much more than i thought it would. I never, in the 1st place, even thought that it would matter to me at all... Who knew..? Anger... Blame no one but myself... Hitting the wall, the concrete basin, all till my knuckles bleed and sore... Still its not a fraction of the pain i feel inside... The boiling water is but a small sting compared to this boot to the face... I guess ive really been wasting my time... No more.... I will not let my own selfish ego take control of my life... To think that sec 2 wasnt hard enuf a punch... Starting now i WILL take my life seriously, as everyday is my last... No more procrastination!! I will put down this selfish ego to sleep permanently.. Still, a changed ex-convict has to serve his time, i will serve mine... I will put myself through the day with 1 meal, when i return home. I wont eat on school or anywhere outside. I will attend every night class this day forth. A small punishment, only myself to blame... I WILL NOT LET THIS HAPPEN AGAIN!! End and Start of Frederick, De Pwnager